Oh, Monday morning, Monday morning couldn't guarantee
That Monday evening you would still be here with me.
Monday, Monday, can't trust that day;
Monday, Monday, sometimes it just turns out that way.
Oh, Monday morning, you gave me no warning of what was to be.
Oh, Monday, Monday, how could you leave and not take me?
Every other day, every other day
Every other day of the week is fine, yeah…- The Mammas and The Pappas
1) and 2) 2020 Freaky Friday - 101 COVID Street & 102 COVID Street
On Friday, after an exhausting week,
Mr. Smarts, a 2nd Grade Teacher with 2 twin class clowns in his class,
and
Mrs. Works-a-lot, Mother of 2 darling twin boys,
at the very same time, had the very same thought,
“I wish I could stay home to teach my own kids.”
On Monday Morning, ABC News granted their wish.
Mr. Smarts and Mrs. Works-a-lot
Found it hard to contain their joy.
Moral: Careful what you wish for on Friday.
Cuz…
Monday — just might turn out that way.
3) When all you have left to eat, are your words - 103 COVID Street
Day 2 of Quarantine, Sally, mother of Alice, was at her wits end.
With hands waving yelled, “How the hell am I supposed to cook dinner
when my shelves and the grocery store shelves are bare!”
“Pipe down mom, I still have Halloween Candy!”
“That’s not dinner.”
“Mom! Remember, Be thankful for what you got!”
“Do you have chocolate?”
“Mom, eat what’s on your plate.”
While glaring, Sally ate her words and 1 roll of Smarties.
“You get what you get and you don’t throw a fit!”
4) Waiter, waits - 104 COVID Street
Thomas, a 22-year-old man — a waiter — was a boy that did not do so well in school. Well, he was a waiter until the other day. Now in quarantine, he found himself unemployed. He was having trouble filing for unemployment. The system kept shutting down. The news said the system was overwhelmed.
While waiting, he realized while he felt alone, he was not. He began venturing out on social media. He often balked at Facebook and all those social media platforms. They’re bad. But he thought, what the heck. It is something to do when trying to wait for the unemployment system to boot back up.
Well, it took days for Thomas to file his unemployment claim. Finally, his submission was successful.
After days of posting on Facebook, Thomas, a dyslectic, thanks to red squiggly lines learned to spell quarantine and self containment.
But more importantly, when practicing social media, Thomas realized those red squiggly lines were not just for him. So like so many students his age, Thomas, enrolled in an online university. These days he can’t wait and he can’t wait to start school.
5) COVID FREEWAY - 105 COVID Street
Leroy Brunsin - A FedEx Driver
Looked in his rear view
And saw his past
And when he looked through his windshield
He saw his future
But with no traffic
What he could NOT see
Was he! He was not in a Hurry
6) Come on, Give it a Try! - 106 COVID Street
Before Mother Madeleine had a congregation, she had a childhood.
Some things about her have never changed, her faith and her love of people.
But, what her congregation of present date does not know about her,
is that she despised those 70s kids running around with matching shirt singing
Come on and Zoom, come on and Zoom, come on and Zoom, come on and Zoom
Come on and Zoom, Zoom, zooma-Zoom (Zoom Zoom)
Come on and Zoom, you call the tune
Come on and Zoom, we're starting soon
Come on and zooma zooma zooma-Zoom (Zoom Zoom Zoom Zoom Zoom!)
We're all plugged into one world now!
So let's talk! We wanna hear from you!
Come on, give it a try!
But these days, the congregation is on Zoom...
And Mother Madeline must practice her social graces
by singing the very same Zoom tune to her congregation.
7) Schooled - 107 COVID Street
For the past 5 years, Mr. Simon, an elementary math teacher, struggled getting his students to understand subtraction. But working in a classroom where he no longer had children running around he had time to plan his lessons. And his students loved it! They loved so much, they told two friends, and they told two friends….and so on.
Mr. Simon’s Subtraction Lesson - Counting Backwards
99 rolls of toilet paper on the shelf,
99 rolls of toilet paper on the shelf
Take one down, put in a cart,
98 rolls of toilet paper on the shelf.
What he did not count on, was a hidden variable — annoyed parents. Emails from annoyed parents added up. Mr. Simon got schooled in Exponential Growth!
8) Strange Tail - 108 COVID Street
Where 4 backyard corners meet, 4 dogs gathered in disbelief.
Fido: “I know what you're saying man.”
Cocco: “It’s just so bizzare..”
Molly: “It’s like all of the sudden, they figured out what leash is for!”
Spot: “I sometimes get to walk two or three times a day.”
Molly: “Yah, Fido I didn’t lick your ass to hi.”
Fido: “Don’t worry, these are strange times.”
Molly: “It’s like they take me out on walks but they don’t stop and talk to anybody.”
Fido: “I know they just walk away from each other.”
Cocco: “I just don’t understand. And they are all home.”
Spot: “Tell me about it, All the attention is nice but I can’t get near a trash can these days.”
9) Music Appreciation 101 -109 COVID Street
Linda Knoughty was not one of those kids that was not forced to attend piano lessons. No, she taught herself to play. THEN, her mom signed her up for lessons. She tried to make a living playing professionally. She did make it in a way.
She was a piano teacher for many great students and some not so great students. In her mind, she called the not so greats, her music appreciation students and Clarence was one of those students. He frustrated her because he just didn’t care. Regardless of his attitude she tried her best to keep up with him as she did with all of her students.
She knew whatever her students were learning, they were learning and it was good for them. She was not bitter about things, she loved teaching piano but she secretly fantasized about being a soloist and a composer. She has let that dream go. That is minor compared to the losses she has experienced lately. Last year, she lost her best friend, her husband. I guess in a way that made her a soloist. But not really, she had a grandson and lots of piano students.
Recently, it got unsafe for her to teach students in person.
Not knowing quite how to teach her students, she told her students, “go home, just play; just play on the piano. Play what you feel; play what moves you. And share it on Facebook or on YouTube. Whatever, but send the link to me.” She wanted to stay connected.
Now alone in her big house, she sat with a glass of wine. She had no music sheets, just a phone on record. Her fingers hit the keys, it wasn’t a pleasant sound. Tears rolled down her face, her audience wasn’t present but she felt him. More tears rolled, she sipped more wine. She sat straight up and faced grief. She had not done that. Her finger danced the dance of love, of understanding, of anger, and of passion.
She wiped the snot from her face, sipped her wine. Then grabbed her phone….and accidently hit post. She couldn’t unpost, the wine made it impossible to undo the past. She went upstairs curly in bed with her dog and a pillow that still wore her husband's t-shirt. She could still smell him.
While she slept, one of her frustrated music appreciation students listened. He had lost his best friend. Clarence cried and felt warmth. He shared her post.
10 ) Frayed Not - 110 COVID Street
Marcy Lingwenski with 72 years of life experience sat with her two cats, Thunder and Mini Miles. Yeah, she is a Broncos fan. During the season, she can be seen watching the game, sipping her beer and yelling “first and 10, do it again.” But when it was not Bronco season and she never turned on the TV. “It’s a useless box unless my team is playing.”
Last night was like most nights during the off season, she forced her arthritic hands to knit while listening to her favorite records. She knitted only with orange yarn. She knitted mittens, hats, and scarves for the homeless. Her cats disturbed her as she knit. She scolded them while she gave them a treat.
Last night her son, Frank called her out of the blue. He seemed worried, “Mom, I love you.”
“Do you need money?” she laughed, “I love you too.”
“Mom have you seen the news?”
“Of course I haven’t, it is always bad.”
“Don’t go out tomorrow! It is not safe.”
You see, after Marcy knits her winter garments, she pushes her walker down the street a few blocks and hands out her hats, scarves, and mittens. She talks to everyone about the Broncos and makes silly punny jokes. “Orange you glad I am here with these mittens.”
Marcy knew from the tone of his voice he was serious. She would listen to him. He explained everything.
“Will you take them to them? I don’t want them to die, they’re Broncos fans.”
“I am afraid not, mom.”
“A fraid not ….that reminds me of that joke...you know the one.”
He did and he knew, despite his best efforts she would tell it, so he listened.
‘’A piece of string walks into a bar and walks up to the counter.
The bartender says, ‘Sorry mate, we don't serve pieces of string in here, get lost.’ Upset, the piece of string walks out the door. A sudden thought strikes him. He ties himself in a knot and messes his hair up. He walks back into the bar and approaches the counter. The bartender says, ‘Oi, aren't you that piece of string from before...?’
‘No,’ says the piece of string, ‘I'm a frayed knot.’ “
“Very funny, mom”
“Seriously Franky, Who will be there for my Broncos Fans.”
“Mom, I love you.”
11) A Spectacle - 111 COVID Street
Two Dust Bunnies stood with their backs against the wall on a painted baseboard that ran along Sal Moore’s kitchen floor. Their eyes were stretched open with fear.
Spec of Dust 1: “He never does that.”
Spec of Dust 2: “It is like he is possessed. Constantly wiping the counters.”
Spec of Dust 1: “Crumbs, I have known for years are gone.”
Spec of Dust 2: “He is gonna wipe us out next!”
Spec of Dust 1: “He won’t go that low.”
12) Introverts make History - 112 COVID Street
Wallane Reed, a curator at the Natural History Museum, has always worried about his kid, Ari. Ari was an introvert. This past September, Ari moved miles away to the University of Illinois. Well yesterday, with everything going on in the world and people needing to isolate, he called Ari to check in.
“Ari, how are you doing?”
“Fine.”
“Do you have food in your apartment for two weeks?”
“Cereal and frozen pizza, Dad. I am fine.”
“Are you sure?”
“I don’t understand what the big deal is.”
“Are you sure? You can’t go out.”
“I never go out. I'm a gamer.”
“How are all the changes at school going?”
“It’s sweet, all my classes are going online.”
“Okay”
“Dad, really I am fine. My life hasn’t changed that much.”
Wallace was silent.
Ari assured his dad, “Tonight, I am watching a streamed movie with friends online.”
“Okay, let me know if you need anything. Love you”
“Love you too.”
As Wallace hung up his landline phone, he recognized that it was a communications artifact. And for the first time in history, he viewed Ari as a communications genius.
13) Maggie does something unheard of - 113 COVID 19 Street
Maggie is a human resources professional and office gossip at a consulting company. She is the hub of information at work. Anyone wanting to know what is going, just asks her. And Maggie tells all. 3 days ago, she started working from home. After back to back conference calls and 3 cups of coffee, Maggie for the first time in a long time attempted to be discreet, to be quiet….she peed ever so quietly while listening to what was going on at the meeting. She did not want to miss a thing.
All of a sudden, everyone on the call started to laugh.
Maggie realized she flushed the toilet. 3 days ago, Maggie, a human resources professional and office gossip, learned to mute herself.
14) Checked Out - 114 COVID 19 Street
For the past 10 years, Kai Hanson, a retired school teacher, worked at King Soopers as a cashier. He did not need the job but it was a way to stay busy. Sometimes he would see former students, most of them parents now. But on Thursdays just after 11:00am, after the YMCA’s Zumba class was out, he would see Winter. She was very friendly and single. His age too. He always wanted to ask her out but never did. He didn’t want to be weird and it was against company policy. In reality, he just wanted a friend.
Sometimes Winter would come down his lane and other times not. She wasn’t avoiding him, it was a matter of the shortest line. When she did come though his line they chatted but it was the kind of chat that was kind.
“Did you find everything you need?”
“No, but don’t suppose you have a million dollars.”
“Plastic Okay?”
“Yeah.”
He knew she recognized his face but didn’t really notice him. Until yesterday, “Kai your no spring chicken and neither am I. I just wanted to say thanks for being here.”
15) Still Going - 115 COVID Street
Gretta and Brook, two sisters live here. They are still making their way home from a longer than expected cruise. They sought captivating sunsets and they got them.
16) Game On -116 COVID 19 Street
Max was a 10 year old that had been homeschooled his whole life. Everyday from 12:30 - 1:30 he had free choice time, and everyday he chose Minecraft. Everyday. Max had his own server and tried to get the kids in his neighborhood to play. Everyday when he logged on, he found nothing. When he asked why the other kids could never play at the same time as him, they told him that they couldn’t when they were at school. On Monday he tried to log in but the server was full. “What the?” When he logged on for the first time he had friends to play with at recess!
17) IDK - 117 COVID 19 Street
I don’t know who lives there. Do you? Kai Hanson knows. He started calling people he had not spoken to in a while. Clark Nelson, his college buddy lives there. They have lived in the same neighborhood for a year and didn’t know it. No shit! They’re going for beers when this is all over.
18) and 19) Connected - 117 and 118 COVID Street
Sean Miller of 117, a realtor, is very frustrated with Alexa.
“Alexa turn off bedroom lights.”
But when he closes his eyes, the lights come back on.
Sydney Price of 118, is very tired. She works Lutheran Hospitals night shift.
“Alexa turn on bedroom lights.”
But the lights keep going off, after 3 or 4 times she gives up and just gets ready in the dark.
©2020 by TC McCracken. All rights reserved.